epikia

it’s already past 2:30 in the morning, yet sleep is still elusive…

i went to bed around 10:30 pm last night and for some reasons after only

about three hours in dreamland, i woke up feeling so anxious. the feeling

did not go off as fast as i want it be. i tried my hardest to go back to

sleep, to no avail. i didn’t want to think of exactly why i was having such

feelings because for one, i don’t like it, and two, my grey matters seemed

so unfit to be wasted at this unholy hour for such brain activity (or so i

thought).

i tried to continue reading the 3rd book of the vampire romance series that

i’m so into right now, but words seemed alien for me to understand. i

repeatedly read the part where Bella and Edward visited Renee in Florida

for a good five minutes. so i decided to stop and ran to the refuge on web

access. (Baby Kits and Pido are inside the room, enjoying a wonderful good

night sleep. good for them.) i checked my mail, with nothing new of much

particular importance. boredom must have hit me that fast, i started to

register for another social network site that Pido invited me to; posted a

few pictures for it and thought about a few words to describe

myself…pretty boring task ayt?

how could i ever miss friendster? so i decided to post our pictures for

when we went to Enchanted Kingdon for our Family Day at 24/7 customer

phils., inc. i was reminded of how fun that day was for us. Kits enjoyed a

few rides that his small figure would allow, and the good food from

Domino’s that his Dad bought. It was so much fun, he even had only few naps

to somehow recharge and then went an extra mile to stay up late til 9pm to

make sure no time was lost in that wonderful place!

(Kits is crying…wait.)

I needed to fix baby his milk and feed Kits and then i’m back to the

notebook…

EK pictures are still loading…i’m only 16% of i think 200+ pictures. i

don’t have any idea if i would last waiting for everything to be uploaded.

(so now i have the reason to stay up soo late! haha!)

what do i have in mind right now? a lot! i would not even dare tell them

all. it will be all tiring…but boring for the most part…hehe. my brain

is like that, it keeps on working even if i don’t want it to. makes me

wonder, is it just me or is it just the way the human brain was designed by

God?

i’m wondering if Kits is having a sweet dream now…or if Pido is into his

REM stage too…are their brains cells all working on a funny tale now, and

their major voluntary muscles all paralysed? did you know that REM stage

(the part of sleeping where most people dream) occurs roughly after 90

minutes after sleep onset?

stop, stop..my thoughts now are being so scientifically boring…

back to where some og thoughts are…

awww…why in the world’s game is friendster taking so much of its time to

upload the pictures?!

anyways, i’m thinking as to when exactly should i submit my resignation

letter to my team leader…goodbyes are always never an easy thing. but i

have no choice now. i’m not happy with what i’m doing at work. recently,

workdays have been very dragging for me. a few days i’ve awaken in the

morning and i needed to convince myself so hard that i love working. that

was not a good thing to do. it’s always never a good thing to pretend, not

when you are being paid for it. lol! so fine, i’m working now because i

need to. i need my job so i can get paid. i need to get paid because we

have bills to pay for, milk to buy, food to buy again, and a lot of other

trivial stuff we need that only money can provide! it pains me that this is

ow it is now, but it has always been one of the very basic realities of

this world, mostly for persons not born with the gold spoon in them, so

they say. harsh. grrr…

but it’s ok. i need to say it’s ok, otherwise i would forever wail and

wallow in a pod of angsts. hey, at least i get to meet a lot of good

friends at work, and then a pack of not-so-good-colleagues, who have given

me so much lessons in life.

(i think friendster is doing their unscheduled system maintenance — a

positive way to say friendster froze! the screen froze on loading one

picture which is less than 1MB in size!)

oh no, it’s already 3:30 am and i’m still here…

wait i have to try and get some sleep again…otherwise i would probably be

not on my best for the rest of the day…

thanks to blogging, time passed me by quickly…

apologies for spending some time reading this when you weren’t able to get

something better out of what i’ve written. =)

will try to sleep now…spiderman will watch over the pictures…

p.s. i’ve written this blog in a notepad first, then saved it to

friendster. just in case you’re wondering how i was able to post a blog and

upload pictures all at the same time. not at the same time,

really…whatever nicey, go to sleep! *wink!* =p

– uploading of pictures was interrupted. i got impatient and hit F5. i’ll

just to the others on another day… see i told you…i failed the

marshmallow test! good early morning!

This song fits exactly the words that I would like to tell to our dear Kits (Enrique Miguel A. Cargullo). It has been more than a month after I gave birth to him and everyday is always a new one for us. I have been discovering new heights of joy in my life with Kits around. It’s such a good feeling for me that God entrusted a life for us to cherish, nurture and love. Now, I dearly appreciate my Mom more because I know that only a mother could give so much love that will never ask for something in return…that’s what my Mom gave us. ..and I was able to realize that I am capable of giving so much love like that. it’s such an extremely wonderful and incomparable feeling. I can now proudly say: "Hey, I am complete!" To all the mothers out there, Kudos! Here’s to Kits…with so much love…

You Changed My Life In A Moment
The Company

(You changed my life in a moment)
Gone…gone..
In a moment in time
All my sorrow is gone… 

there…i had the urge to write again, thank Heavens…

today i wanted to discuss about the things that i noticed with call centre people. yes, i am working as one of them right now and yet i remain to be the observer, taking the best efforts to capture details of moments while they last.

DISCLAIMER: the ff: things are merely my observations. i am not stereotyping but only stating habits/things i saw which may or may not be applicable to me personally. hahaha.

1. jackets — sometimes, it could get darn freezing cold in the office, you just needed to bring ‘em with you. and when you’re going home it could look funny because it’s totally hot outside! wag ka! iba-iba kulay, design, haba, laki ng mga jackets, pde mo makita! katuwa nga eh! =)

2. water bottles — talking for like 7.5 hrs could really get you dehydrated, specifically your oral mucosa. very essential to me, personally. problema nga lang, dahil malamig ang environment, madalas ako bisita ng "the john"…

3. coffee mugs — "ilabas and starbucks sealed mugs!" this is i guess most in need by agents who work at night. not anymore for me. one could get soo hooked to coffee, the color of your blood must be already in the shade of capuccino! can’t forget when i was with Daksh. bumabaha coffe sa vendo machine! halos di ko na kilala tubig nung mga araw na yun! good thing i recovered my sense of health consciousness kuno, now i’m back to the ever-reliable universal solvent. =)

4. a big population of CSRs are smokers. pampaalis daw stress, pagkabagot at antok sabi ng mga kaibigan ko. stop right there. i hope i made it clear i’m not into smoking…;) 15 minute break, kahet 40th flr pa yan, bibilisan mga hakbang makahithit lang ng yosi. one thing i’ve noticed? yosi people are cool with irrate customers. taka nga ako eh. kasi di ba dapat naaapektuhan nya yung feel good hormone mo, in the sense na bumababa? but i’m honestly seeing the total opposite. hmmm…=)

5. here’s something that i can totally relate to—PAGKAIN! i dunno what’s with this career. nakakagutom! we love to eat! we enjoy it and we don’t care about diet! say no more to Nemo’s: "no eating here tonite! no eating here tonite! we’re on a diet! we’re on a diet!" hahaha!

wait lang… i think i wanted to write something of a different topic ulet! gotta save this and start anew! =)

Upside Down

I’ve been spending some time, thinking I’d be alright
Don’t know if I could really make it tonight
Lie awake in the dark, come down then I start
Thinking about you is almost breaking my heart

I don’t know where I went wrong, or what’s going on
Baby, I fell like our love’s lost tonight
Should I stay, should I go? Well, I really don’t know
Lately I’ve been missing you so

[Refrain]
Baby, you don’t understand love lies lost
But your still holding my hand
Oh and then you walk away
Just tonight, I want you to stay

[Chorus]
You’re turning me on, you turn me around
You tum my whole world upside down

Everytime I hurt you, well it’s hurting me too
Don’t know if I could really stay here tonight
Tired of thinking of you, I never think that you do
Tell me what am I supposed to do

Well, I just wanted to stay that I need you today
Tell me it’s all gonna work out alright
I don’t know where I should start, but with all of my heart
Baby let me be your lover tonight

i’ve been working as a call center agent for almost a year now…and there are just a lot of stories that i wish to share to everyone. funny stories, sad moments, call booboo’s, stressful times–but i would not die from that! God forbid! ;), stuff that i got to learn eventually, moments of magic with this career, and of course the friends that made my call center life a momentous one.

i am honestly having a hard time as of writing as to which one i want to comprehensively discuss first. it has always been my problem with writing you know. i’ve got lots of things in mind that everything would just mix up and then i would end up writing nothing! grrr…

so, fine. i’ll decide. pls give me a moment here…

hmmm…

still thinking…i apologize.

heck, blame it to my indecisive nature of being a woman… hehehe.

there! i wish to tell you something about how a call center life grew on me…

before my graduation, something came up that made me change my mind not to pursue my nursing career just yet.as it is a known fact that the offshoring business is a hit here in philippines (rationale: we are good english communicators, filipinoes are hard-working, patient, and we offer a competitive labor fee–that means less expensive for the companies wishing to partner with us), that was my first target for work and earning my own monies. so there, i applied for a CSR (customer service representative) post. right after graduation, i went directly here in manila for that.

i wish to discuss the steps that i went through job to give an overview for those who might want to get in as well. but since i am now with my 3rd call center company (beat that, in a matter of one year! hahaha), i’ve learned that there isn’t actually any generic process. basically i went through with interviews, computer-based exams with words that i honestly have no knowledge that they even exist (thanks to the ever reliable intuitive guessing. hahaha), series of call simulation, interviews again, a big deal of waiting at the lounge that sometimes could mean not taking a proper meal for lunch (like in my case, i had biscuits. sad for a heafty eater like me ayt?). of course i need to mention the heart-breaking nervousness that go with the process…plus that pessimistic mind-setting that you did not perform well with the toll gates for passing. grrr…

after which, the best part of it all is when you were able to go through everything in a day (one-day processing they call it) and you are given the "offer" (contract that stipulates the terms and conditions of employment, benefits, monthly salary, etc)! that would certainly give you all the relief that you can get after cranky stuff mentioned above. you can now bring home the bacon per se. way to go!

——————–

ops, sowi. it hit me again! grr…my mind’s all in a haywire now. will continue again next time…

Way Back Into Love

Hugh Grant and Drew Barrymore

I‘ve be living with a shadow overhead
I’ve be sleeping with a cloud above my bad
I’ve be lonely for so long
Trapped in the past,
I just can’t seen to move on

All I want to do is find a way back into love
I can’t make it trough without a way back into love
And if I open my heart to you
I hopping you’ll show me what to do
And if you help me to start again
You know that I’ll be there for you in the end

Thanks to You
T. Collins

Thank you for teaching me how to love
Showing me what the world means
What i’ve been dreamin’ of
And now i know, there is nothing that i could not do
Thanks to you

For teaching me how to feel
Showing me my emotions
Letting me know what’s real
From what is not
What i’ve got is more that i’d ever hoped for
And a lot of what i hope for is
Thanks to you

No mountain, no valley
No time, no space
No heartache, no heartbreak
No fall from grace
Can’t stop me from believing
That my love will pull me through
Thanks to you

(adlib)

There’s no mountain, no valley
No time, no space
No heartache, no heartbreak
No fall from grace
Can’t stop me from believing
That my love will see me through
Thanks to you
Thanks to you

For teaching me how to live
Putting things in perspective
Teaching me how to give
And how to take
No mistake
We were put here together
And if i breakdown
Forgive me but it’s true
That i’m aching with the love i feel inside
Thanks to you
Thanks to you

IN LOVE WITH YOU
Regine Velasquez with Jacky Cheung
(J. Laudon)

Just a gentle whisper
Told me that you’d gone
Leaving only memories
Where did we go wrong
I couldn’t find the words then
So let me say them now
I’m still in love with you

Tell me that you love me
Tell me that you care
Tell me that you need me
And I’ll be there
I’ll be there waiting

I will always love you
I will always stay true
There’s no one who loves you like I do
Come to me now
I will never leave you
I will stay here with you
Through the good and bad I will stand true
I’m in love with you

Now we’re here together
Yesterday has passed
Life is just beginning
Close to you at last
And I promise to you
I will always be there
I give my all to you

Living life without you
Is more than I can bear
Hold me close forever
I’ll be there
I’ll be there for you

I will always love you
I will always stay true
There’s no one who loves you like I do
This is promise…
I will never leave you
I will stay here with you
Through the good and bad I will stand true
Hold me closer…
Our love is forever
Holding us together
Nothing in this world can stop us now
Love has found
Love has found a way

I’m in love (I’m so in love)
I’m in love (Yes, I’m in love)
I’m in love with you (I’m so in love with you)

My heart is joyful. I am now seeing a lot of things that I thought were amiss before. I am appreciating my family more and more each day. I am sharing my being to a good soul whom I dearly love. I think I have lost some of my closest friends and yet more of them still remain. I have gone through tough times that molded me to become a better indivual. I have wondered why a lot of things are better left unsaid and yet I know that a lot of things are better spoken. It has been a thrilling experience to do the exact opposite of what was expected of me, and yet it’s a whole lot wonderful not to care a bit of what everybody would say. Sometimes I would miss the old times, but I am better with what I have now. I smile a lot, sing a few lines of different songs, and cook most often than I ever did before! There are times when I would look back at how things were for me…so laidback…so amazingly simple…so plain. Then I’d check on how they are now for me…fast-paced…too complicated, maybe…yet undoubtly great! I never knew I would come to this certain point in my life when I’d say I am happy of how I have grown to be the person I am now. =)